Poop Scouts and Popcorn


As I have mentioned I have two large dogs.  These dogs have become very passionate about tennis balls as you can see from the picture below and thanks to my FIL and his tennis addiction I have hundreds of “dead” tennis balls at my disposal. My yard is quickly becoming a tennis ball graveyard. With the mild winter and the dogs’ ball fetching passion we have been spending a lot of time in our backyard these days hitting tennis balls, playing on the swing set and playing run and chase.










That outdoor scenario sounds really great until I mention that while we’re out there we are dodging poop mines thanks to those two large canines. It turns out that large dogs take large poops so they are typically easy to spot although we do ride around on the four wheeler  and the dogs aren’t always careful where they step so scouting isn’t always a simple task.  We play outside in our boots.

However, since we’ve started playing in the backyard more and since I’m hosting an Easter egg hunt at my house in April for my mom’s group I’m making a concerted effort to be a better poop picker-upper. That’s where these two hooligans come in.













I enlisted their help today to be my poop scouts. They were instructed to sweep the yard for poop and report back to me when they located piles. Lilly set off enthusiastically saying, “I think I saw a large dump over here!”   It sounded funny and cute when she said it but now that I write it down it seems a lot more disgusting. Sorry for that. Please forgive me. Any ways, after about a half hour of shoveling I completed my chore although the kids ditched me after about 10 minutes. I feel accomplished.

Are you done hearing about poop yet? I thought so.

I don’t want you leaving here feeling dirty from my poop story so here’s something I think you may be amused by.

The scenario:

This afternoon I made popcorn since I was hungry and I knew the kids would dig it. I divided the popcorn into 3 servings; 2 small ones for the kids and one larger one for me. As I’m scarfing down my popcorn (homestyle of course) I thought to myself, “I bet Lilly is going to want more. I should save some for her.” Then I ate every last morsel as fast as I could. It was a nice thought to save some for my darling daughter but the buttery, salty deliciousness was too much for my paltry self control.

Just about the time I wiped the crumbs from my belly (because that’s where crumbs collect when you’re pregnant) Lilly comes in with her empty bowl, “Mama, please I may have more popcorn?”

And I thought to myself, “Mama, you’re an ass.”

What I said to that beautiful girl with her large brown, pleading eyes was, “Um, I’m sorry, sweetie. The ah, the baby ate it all! Yeah, that baby is a popcorn monster!” She looked at me a little disappointed, a little amused and a lot like I was the craziest person she’d ever met.

She settled for some cheese and crackers and I settled for being the crazy mom. A little crazy can be a lot of fun!

Just keeping it fun, people.


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